The Place Where I Come From

I graduated from Clemson University in 2000 and left school with my diploma in my hand and never looked back. But, all those years of school changed me. I grew up at Clemson and became the person I am today. I learned and grew, not in the scholarly way (well, maybe that too), but learned about life. There were so many hard lessons and it felt good to close that chapter of my life. Sometimes in these eleven years, I've been wistful about that time when I was on the horizon and the sun was rising and my possibilites seemed endless. I really wanted Firoze to visit Clemson with me, but for some reason, we just never did.

Well, finally after our trip to Greenville, it just made sense. We were heading home in the same direction and Clemson is literally 10 minutes from the highway. It just made sense to go. We had the boys in the car and I felt like I wanted my family to see the place where I came from, the place where I became myself.

It's hard for most people to understand because they probably lived it up in college and partied every weekend. But I was different. I had this drive and it literally pushed me to the breaking point. I wanted to be an engineer and be "better than the boys." I wanted to work full time and pay for things myself. I wanted to take risks and push myself, figure skating full time and rowing crew and learning Russian. I pushed and pushed until I was mentally and physically done. There were so many amazing and wonderful moments, but at the same time, it broke me down. It's hard to describe because I loved it and hated it all at the same time. That's why going back had my stomach in knots and my heart was beating fast.

But we went and for a moment, I was 18 again and time seemed strange.



I was in this same spot on my first day on campus. I had so many questions about my life. Now I have the answers to those questions. That's what I was thinking.



As we were driving up to my old dorm, the marching band literally spilled on to the street in front of us. It brought back those warm memories, of orange and purple, of school spirit, of the fun in being young.



Sitting outside my dorm, it was surreal. I lived there for almost seven years. It was exactly the same. The trees were the same and the branches that I looked out on were in the same spot. The only new additions were my husband and kids next to me. It was amazing to be back in that spot and to show Firoze where I lived and where I walked every day. It felt good to walk those paths again.



We walked down to Death Valley and it was so amazing to show Firoze and the boys around campus. He finally got a picture of the images I have described to him for years.



When I told Firoze, "I can't believe it's been 11 years since I have been here." He said how fast time flies and said "in another 12 years, Devon will be ready to start college." I think I got weak in the knees. What if the next time I'm here, Devon is starting college? You just never know. That's what is so amazing about life. It always surprises you.



Maybe Devon or Dean will follow in my footsteps and go to Clemson. I would rock my orange and purple and be so proud. Proud and happy!



And I'll tell them all about the place I came from. The time at Clemson when I learned about life and grew up and became myself.